Can you imagine what your life would be like if you stopped worrying about money?
Forget the opulence of soccer mansions, the private jets of the ultra-rich and making enough money to last you a hundred years.
Of course it would be nice. But that's not what I'm talking about. I'm not referring to the Hollywood dreams of wealth and excess. You don't need an escapist dream, you need to stop worrying about money.
In our very private moments, most of us have simple dreams when it comes to money and life.. We want to stop worrying about money and live a life full of meaning and satisfaction.
Is that too much to want?
No, it's not much to want to know how to stop worrying about money.
Getting rid of money stress is a worthy dream and you can make it come true; You can stop worrying about money and live your life on your own terms. However, there is a part of you that doubts, that keeps asking:
Could this really be possible? Could I really become a master at not worrying about money?
Yes, it is.
But before you go any further, ask yourself if you have what it takes to change the way you handle money, or if you are content to be a financial loser.
You also need to understand that not worrying about money has very little to do with how much money you have..
I know people worth millions who still worry if that's enough; And I knowPeople who have very little and never care about money.
The dream of being free from money worries is incredible. But dreams are worth two cents, after all, and you and I live in the "real" world, right?
We live in a world where dreams are dreams, but your bills are still staring you in the face when you wake up, right?
Well, looks like you should give this a listen...
Worrying about money ruined my life
My stomach clenched and I paced the hotel room restlessly. It was October 2009, around 3:45 am. By the way, it was also three days after my husband told me thatwe had £100,000 (about $160,000) in consumer debt.
Walking around a room feeling sick with money worries was nothing new to me. Heck, for that pivotal night in October 2009, I had been worrying about money for over twenty years.
When I was young and doing my PhD, I worried about paying my rent and surviving until the next payday. (I often survived by pawning my typewriter; those were the days.)
Later I worried:
- the mortgage;
- my husband is leaving his job;
- how much we pay for our vacation;
- the future of our children; And
- The interest rate
As if that wasn't enough, my money worries spread to my parents, my sister, my niece and...
Well, my concern for money became universal and abstract.
After we had found out exactly how high our debts were, it was no problem. I was scared and my mind drew pictures of my son who lived at a 19Iscentury of poverty and deprivation.
In November 2009 my money worries made me sick. I couldn't eat, sleep or plan. All I did was blame my husband (not entirely justified) and cry every time I looked at my young son.
Fast forward to March 2010 and worry about money has been replaced by a determination to change our financial path.
Why did I decide not to worry about money anymore?
How did I stop worrying about money after spending most of my life in acute money stress?
That's easy. I woke up one morning and thought I'd had enough.
I'd had enough of worrying about debt, resentment about making more money, and certainly enough of allowing my mostly irrational fears to get so out of control they seemed to be eating my soul.
In short, I was fed up with worrying about money.
Most importantly, I had an epiphany.
Worrying about money, like most worries in life, is meaningless because it doesn't allow us to move forward.
Now you may think that my enlightenment was just a glimpse of reality. For me, this was the cornerstone of figuring out how to stop worrying about money.
Worrying about money is useless because:
#1. get your energy out
Worrying about money is exhausting. As for thatworrying about anything is exhausting.
Worry, a negative emotion, drains your energy by robbing you of meaning and purpose in your life. It turns into fears that make you cower in the face of life and try to avoid it at all costs.
That being said, worry leads to insomnia, and as all parents know, sleep deprivation is exhausting. Lack of sleep not only slows down your body but also your mind.
#2. Divert your attention from what is important
What matters in life is living. Your life is shaped by your actions and your actions are shaped by the way you think.
If you are concerned about money or any other aspect of your life, direct your attention to the fears that have fed your imagination rather than the activities that make up your life.
You know your energy goes where attention goes, right?
#3. Transform yourself into a person you don't know
Worries about money inevitably affect your behavior. For example, he discovers that he can no longer enjoy his life, that he feels guilty when he buys an ice cream cone.
Worse, if you worry too much about money, you can become a miser, unable to be generous.
In short, money worries can turn you into a person you don't recognize.
#4. Makes you a person you don't like
It's not just that money worries can turn you into a person you don't know, they can also turn you into a person you don't like very much.
Every time you secretly envy your partner's food choices, you lose a little bit of your self-esteem.
So he had had enough. I had to figure out how to stop worrying about money.
Above all, I had to figure out how to stop worrying about money when I really didn't have to.
How to stop worrying about money
Excellent; I thought you never asked
You see, worry is an emotional state caused by three things:
- Ignorance; And
- In action
This means that worrying about money has very little to do with how much money we have.and everything to do with our beliefs, fears, knowledge and actions related to money.
It took me six months to move from:
"The thought of money makes me tremble more than an alcoholic before his first drink"
'Oh yeah! I am a fearless money ninja willing to create wealth or die trying.”
These are the steps I took to stop worrying about money and start building serious wealth.
#1. Learn to deal with the uncertainty surrounding debt and money
Many believe that we deal with uncertainty by increasing certainty in our lives.
We deal with uncertainty by convincing our subconscious that we will survive no matter what life throws at us and by developing the necessary skills to deal with uncertainty; even thrive on it.
In my case, dealing with the uncertainty took the following:
- Affirmations every night before bed. I kept repeating "everything will be fine" until my eyelashes fluttered softly with exhaustion. (Sounds weird, I know, but it works.)
- I have developed an open and flexible attitude.. It's not about accepting everything that comes your way, but about seeing what's coming and adjusting your behavior accordingly.
- I have found an anchor of certainty. When you're swimming in a sea of uncertainty, you need something to hold on to. For me it was my love (son and husband) and determination to pay off all debts as soon as possible.
You have to play with the details here; these would be different for different people.
The important thing is to recognize thatyou don't want certainty; You need to find ways to deal with uncertainty.
#2. Dealing with fears about earning money and future security
Do you think your sense of security depends on how much money you have?
Because if that were right, you'd be worried about retirement if you had a good retirement plan (yes, I know; but I've also been worried about my retirement while contributing to a gilded retirement plan).
My experience shows that the only way to be confident that your future is secure is to develop the skills and abilities that will ensure your survival, and possibly your success, no matter what.
In my case, I had to develop skills that I know would get me out of the hole if I lost everything: money, house, pension.
#3. Understand that you need very little in life
We can all be drawn into believing that we all need everything around us in life.
It's not like this. In fact, we need very little to live a happy, fulfilling, and contented life.
I know you are skeptical about this; Me too, until I learned better.
You have to leave your comfort zone for that. For example, the next time you only pack hand luggage for a three-week trip. Or retreat to a place where you can live a simple life and learn or practice life skills.
Once you know that you need very little to live a happy life, much of your worries about money will go away where it belongs.
#4. correct your ignorance
So I was worried about money, scared of debt and knew very little about our financial situation.
You see, ignorance increases the level of insecurity and makes you worry more.
What have I done?
I have shed my ignorance about money in general and our financial situation in particular.
I calculated what we earn and what we spend to the pound. I found out where we are wasting money, how we can make what we do cheaper and at the same time what we don't want to spend money on.with the money management system ERR.
(There are handy money management tools that can help you gather the information you need to implement the ERR system. You can useThe monthly budget planner based on the money principleor use a money management app. here you can learnhow to open an account with Money Dashboardand how you can use it to improve your budgeting skills).
I also learned something very important:
The only number that matters in personal finance isyour monthly cash flow.
But I didn't just learn about personal finance.
I learned about cooking, nutrition and exercise.
I learned about index funds, value investing, dividend investing, everythingThings about investing that a beginner should know.
I learned how to make money.
And I learned about the business and howinvest in business.
When I was done with my ignorance, my knowledge gave me firmness and my learning never ended.
#5. Learn to trade; and act immediately
When I was most worried about money, I did very little to change my financial situation.
So I started doing things.
I checked the bank balances.
I wrote a money diary.
I hurried like mad.
(I still do that.)
You see, friend, five months is not long enough to drastically change your financial situation.
Five months is more than enough time to stop worrying about money and turn your financial situation into a problem that can be solved.
Seven years, on the other hand, should be enough to change your financial situation.
Where am I today?
Well, dude, I'm certainly not worried about money and haven't had it in years. Also, between January 2010 and January 2018 we have gone from £100,000 in consumer debt to over £250,000 in new investment.
I doubt this would have been possible had I cared about money anymore.
#6. Change your financial situation
You will have noticed that up to now I have told you how to stop worrying about money by changing your attitudes, your beliefs, the way you think and behave.
Well, I'm telling you that changing your financial situation will also help you stop worrying about money.
There are four areas where you can make significant changes.
Pay off your debt.I fall. We made itpay all our debtsexcept for the mortgage (and we have enough money to pay the mortgage; we just get better interest on the money than we save by paying the mortgage). Being debt free would make you less vulnerable to pressure from creditors and you could breathe easy and stop worrying so much about money.
build investments. Having reserves on hand is always helpful when it comes to relieving financial stress and no longer worrying about money. The point here is that what would make you more secure and your life financially sound isn't your net worth. The trick would be to build up liquid assets that you can access quickly in times of need and crisis. This is a bit controversial, but I also have gold coins (easily accessible) - it makes me feel safer and sleep better at night.
build income. Learn to make money with the different skills you have. Don't be a one-trick pony; Learn to think and act more broadly.
Manage your money. Smart spending is always good for your bank account. It's also good for your emotions and sense of security.
Most of us spend our lives worrying about money: we worry about getting enough to sustain our life, or we worry about keeping, increasing, and sustaining it.
Worrying about money has little to do with how much we have; it comes from feelings of insecurity, ignorance and inaction.
You can continue to have sleepless nights worrying about money or you can try these steps, leave your money worries behind and change your life and finances - it's entirely up to you.
worried about money? What are your main concerns and what have you done about them?
- Don't let money consume your thoughts.
- Get organized.
- Let go.
- Set up monthly auto payments.
- Talk to someone about your financial stress.
- Manage your health to build wealth.
- Focus on your financial goals.
- Live a little.
One of the main reasons why you shouldn't worry about money is that your stress is unlikely to achieve anything. Financial stress can be incredibly difficult to set aside. It often results in a loss of sleep, a breakdown in your relationships and other negative effects like mood swings.Why do I worry about money so much? ›
Low or unsteady income
You're more likely to worry about money if you don't have much of it, since lower income leaves you more vulnerable to disruptions. If you live paycheck to paycheck, you probably don't have a savings account or home equity to fall back on in emergencies.
Mayo Clinic. With this mind, we can reasonably define money dysmorphia as: Dissatisfaction associated with one or more perceived defects or flaws in our finances — a flaw that appears minor or can't be seen by others.What does the Bible say about worrying about money? ›
Philippians 4:6-7 (GNTD)
Don't worry about anything, but in all your prayers ask God for what you need, always asking him with a thankful heart.
In a recent study conducted by university psychologists at the U.K. universities of Bath, Bath Spa and Exeter, most people said that $10m (£8.6m) was an ideal amount to lead a "comfortable life." Researchers asked 8,000 people the same questions in 33 countries around the world across 6 continents.What is toxic money mindset? ›
Toxic money habits are more about bad financial behavior rather than your literal money. Toxic habits come in many forms, but the most common are: lying about how much money you have, shopping away your feelings via retail therapy, and relying on credit cards rather than cash in hand.Is money the number one worry? ›
Younger people are more likely to report being financially stressed overall. Money — including amount of debt, savings and general money management — is the number one stressor for adults ages 18 to 57, according to the 2022 “Stress in America” survey.What percentage of people worry about money? ›
According to the Mind over Money survey by Capital One and The Decision Lab, 77% of Americans report feeling anxious about their financial situation. Select offers advice on how to manage your finances so you can feel more in control. If you worry about finances, you're far from alone.Can lack of money cause depression? ›
A number of studies have demonstrated a cyclical link between financial worries and mental health problems such as depression, anxiety, and substance abuse. Financial problems adversely impact your mental health. The stress of debt or other financial issues leaves you feeling depressed or anxious.
What causes financial anxiety? According to Blackwell, there are many triggers that can cause financial anxiety. Some common ones include a potential job loss, a money misstep, a lack of personal finance education or your childhood beliefs about money.What does financial anxiety look like? ›
Those who suffer from financial anxiety are continually worrying about bills and might be afraid to look at their bank account or cope with anything to do with personal finances. And like other forms of anxiety, financial anxiety is unhealthy.What are the 7 money tendencies? ›
- Spender or Saver.
- Nerd or Free Spirit.
- Experiences Person or Things Person.
- Quality Person or Quantity Person.
- Safety Person or Status Person.
- Abundance Person or Scarcity Person.
- Spontaneous Giver or Planned Giver.
Money will not make us happy.
1 Timothy 6:17 says, “Instruct those who are rich in the present age not to be arrogant or to set their hope on the uncertainty of wealth, but on God, who richly provides us with all things to enjoy.” We all must use money. However, having money or spending money cannot be the end goal.
Avarice is one of the Seven deadly sins in the Christian classifications of vices (sins).How does God want us to treat money? ›
Live on Less Than You Make and Save
That means living on less than you make—so you'll have money left over to save. The Bible talks about the importance of saving in Proverbs 21:20 (NIV84), which says, “In the house of the wise are stores of choice food and oil, but a foolish man devours all he has.”
Based on that figure, an annual income of $500,000 or more would make you rich. The Economic Policy Institute uses a different baseline to determine who constitutes the top 1% and the top 5%. For 2021, you're in the top 1% if you earn $819,324 or more each year. The top 5% of income earners make $335,891 per year.How much money does a person need to live comfortably? ›
In a 2021 modern wealth survey, Americans told Charles Scwab that they need an average net worth of $934,000 to be financially comfortable. Another survey by Personal Capital says that Americans believe that they need to save an average of $516,000 to maintain financial health.How much money is enough to live in USA? ›
The estimated living cost for the US is around $10,000 to $18,000 per year, which averages around $1,000 to $1,500 per month. This includes your accommodation costs, room, and board, food, travel, textbooks, weather-appropriate clothing, and entertainment expenses as well.What is a money narcissist? ›
Narcissists often use money as a tool for punishment. They may reward you financially when you do what they want, and then withhold money when they feel vindictive. This can feel unsafe, degrading and confusing.
- The saver: Save today to enjoy tomorrow.
- The spender: Enjoy the best that life has to offer.
- The builder: Make the most of your money.
- The giver: Care for the community first.
The super-rich are slightly happier than the rich.
In other words, the super-rich are slightly happier at extreme levels of wealth. The $1-$2 millionaires reported a 7.8 out of 10 happiness whereas the $10+ multimillionaires came in just above an 8.0 out of 10.
- Death of a loved one.
- Major illness or injury.
- Job loss.
American Entrepreneur and acclaimed motivational speaker and author Jim Rohn once said: “Time is more valuable than money. You can get more money, but you cannot get more time.” This is a concept that I feel many people would agree with.Do money matters in life? ›
Money is not everything, but money is something very important. Beyond the basic needs, money helps us achieve our life's goals and supports — the things we care about most deeply — family, education, health care, charity, adventure and fun.What do rich people have to worry about? ›
From the most expected fears like losing power, control, money, status or being hunted during the crisis, we get to the more profound and personal ones of being isolated, cheated, not being recognized as competent at work, losing a sense of life purpose, being anxious for their children, having bad friendships, or not ...Is everyone struggling financially? ›
Across the board, American workers are struggling financially. Even high earners are struggling more than last year, Salary Finance said. Of those making more than six figures, roughly half are having a harder time staying afloat and have less in savings than they did in 2021.Is money the biggest stress? ›
Audrey Hamilton: Money is a top cause of stress for many Americans. That's according to the latest Stress in America survey conducted by the American Psychological Association. Stress can negatively affect health and even contribute to chronic health problems such as diabetes and heart disease.How do I get mental help if I don't have money? ›
If you're desperately in need of immediate mental health services, visit a community mental health clinic. As Matthews points out, they “often offer low-cost treatment through use of interns or because they receive supplemental funding from places like the United Way.”What is the root cause of overspending? ›
Peer pressure, boredom, marketing offers, credit cards and ignoring petty expenses can lead to breaking your budget, experts say. Overspending will always have a negative effect on your budget.
Having lower income was associated with higher prevalence of depressive symptoms. The prevalence of depressive symptoms was 39.3% for participants with family income under $20,000, 25.5% for participants with family income from $20,000–$75,000, and 14.9% for participants with family income greater than $75,000.What are five warning signs of financial trouble? ›
- Paying your bills after the payment due date. ...
- Missing your credit card or loan payments altogether. ...
- Relying on overtime to cover your debt related expenses. ...
- Borrowing from family members to make your monthly debt payments. ...
- Skipping one credit card bill to pay another.
- List your assets (what you own), estimate the value of each, and add up the total. Include items such as: ...
- List your liabilities (what you owe) and add up the outstanding balances. ...
- Subtract your liabilities from your assets to determine your personal net worth.
Instead, high-functioning anxiety typically refers to someone who experiences anxiety while still managing daily life quite well. Generally, a person with high-functioning anxiety may appear put together and well- accomplished on the outside, yet experience worry, stress or have obsessive thoughts on the inside.What is the 80 20 rule money? ›
Key points. The 80/20 budgeting method is a common budgeting approach. It involves saving 20% of your income and limiting your spending to 80% of your earnings. This technique allows you to put savings first, and it's both flexible and easy.What are the 4 rules of money? ›
Spend less than you make. Spend way less than you make, and save the rest. Earn more money. Make your money earn more money.What are 5 good money habits? ›
- Set S.M.A.R.T. financial goals. ...
- Schedule regular check-ins with your money. ...
- Track your spending. ...
- Use the 48-hour rule. ...
- Round up to save up.
The fear of taking action can cause you to do nothing, you can't make money through inaction. Too much fear of losing money will lead you to not put any money at risk for the opportunity to make money.Why is too much money harmful? ›
Too much money is like too much time; work expands to fill the time allotted, and ways to spend money multiply when abundant financial resources are available. By being simply too good at raising money, it enabled us to perpetuate poor organizational structure and suboptimal strategic decisions.Why does thinking about money make me panic? ›
Financial anxiety is a feeling of worry, fear, or unease about your finances. It can be caused by a variety of different reasons, not just a lack of funds. Sometimes it's brought on by other forms of anxiety, like generalized anxiety disorder or math anxiety.
Money matters to happiness, perhaps more so than previously thought, according to new research. One potential reason: Higher earners feel an increased sense of control over life. 'Across decisions big and small, having more money gives a person more choices and a greater sense of autonomy,' he says.Does money bring unhappiness? ›
This introduces another factor; money can make you unhappy. Or reduce happiness in other ways. Studies have shown that being paid to do something you enjoy can make you less motivated to do it, suggesting it actively reduces potential happiness.Is money everything yes or no? ›
Money is not everything, but money is something very important.Does chasing money make you happy? ›
Research shows that after we make enough money to pay our bills and save for the future, making more does little for our happiness. If anything, once people start making a lot of money, they begin to think they're doing worse in life, because they become obsessed with comparing themselves to those who are richer.Does money change a person? ›
Psychologists who study the impact of wealth and inequality on human behavior have found that money can powerfully influence our thoughts and actions in ways that we're often not aware of, no matter our economic circumstances.Why does everyone want money? ›
Why Do We Need Money? Money can't buy happiness, but it can buy security and safety for you and your loved ones. Human beings need money to pay for all the things that make your life possible, such as shelter, food, healthcare bills, and a good education.